From Class To Ass

Finding fresh things to say about the presidential transition …


… is like trying to write a sci-fi story about some fantastic technological wonder that hasn’t been invented yet, and hoping you get it finished before that same technological wonder shows up on the shelves at Best Buy.

Truly, judging by what reels by on my Facebook feed—not to mention the news shows, the talk shows, the comedy shows, the editorial pages, the front pages, even the funnies pages—everyone out there is struggling to find the right words to express the mix of sentiments over the Obamas being replaced by the Trumps. I probably ought to just stay out of it. No way can I top what has already been said about how much we will miss the out-going, or how much we dread the in-coming.

But dog-gone it, I got feelings to! This is, bar none, the most traumatic political transition since … since … well, let us just say there’s no one still around who remembers the last political transition that was this traumatic. (This would apply, of course, only to Americans. People in the Ukraine, Rwanda, Argentina, Afghanistan, Iraq, Weimar Germany, pre-Mussolini Italy, the Balkans, North Korea, Pinochet’s Chile, Cuba, Zimbabwe … am I leaving anyone out? … would have their own ideas of what a traumatic political transition is.)

So, in an effort to satisfy my need to express my own, personal emotions during these emotional times, I have decided to trim it down to its most fundamental. You may read it as a poem, if you like. It’s not a poem, even though it sort of looks like one … maybe even sounds like a poem from place to place. It is, at its most simple and basic, what we had, and what we’re getting.


From Class To Ass

From clean to mean,

From ready to petty,

From honor to conner,

From witty to shitty,

From smile to revile,

From gracious to racist,

From loving to lying,

From nice to narcissist,

From solid to squalid,

From humble to hokum,

From kindly to cunning,

From the light to the blight,

From brilliant to braggart,

From calm to calamity,

From studied to stupid,

From charming to cheesy,

From eloquence to malevolence,

From empathy to abnormality,

From friendly to fraudulent,

From thoughtful ideas to full idiocracy,

From grand, stirring speeches to the snatching of pussy,

From decent behaviors to hiring piss whores,

From her healthy foods to the other’s hot nudes,

From polite, smart kids to pampered punk eye-sores,

From the audacity of hope to a paucity of honor,

From “Yes … we can!” to “ME … the great man!”,

From thoughts spelled out clearly to infantile tweets,

From lofty ideals to featherweight rants,

From blessing to curse,

From better to worse,

From a prince among men,

To a huge horse’s ass,

From I wish that I knew him,

To I wish him to fail,

From the best of America,

To four years straight from Hell.



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